Tuesday, July 31, 2012

Skunks, Possums, Glocks and City Law

I've had this skunk living in my backyard for a couple weeks now.  That of course is not a reference to my backyard neighbor, the life long Democrat.

Anyway, this skunk has been out every night for a week now and about 2:00-3:00 am comes that wonderful smell straight up into our bedroom window.
I brought this up with a few friends who listen to my show and one of them, who will remain unnamed....told me a great story.

It seems HE too had a skunk problem a few weeks back.  So being a law abiding guy, he set out traps (I didn't even know there were skunk traps) since evidently the city of Keizer doesn't allow you to shoot your gun in your own backyard.  
One night he heard a horrific screaming from his backyard.  He went out, flipped on the lights and found a possum in the trap.  When he approached the critter it played, well, possum.  It pretended to be dead.

My friend said to the possum "well ok, you wanna play dead, then let's make sure" and pulled out his Glock 9mm and dispatched the big fat rat.

Now again, being a law abiding citizen, he knew that he couldn't just bury the dang thing in his backyard as that is against city ordinance as well.  So he did like any good "green" person would do, he called the city and asked if it'd be ok if he put a dead possum into the green can, you know the one for food scraps and lawn clippings?  He was told that that would be "ok".  So now that he has gotten rid of the possum, he still has the skunk and so do I.  If you live anywhere near me and hear a loud shot in the night, just know that you can sleep well, another skunk has gone to wherever they go when they leave this earth.  And I WILL put it in the green can.

1 comment:

psychobob said...

.22 pistol + sub-sonic ammo + 20oz pop bottle + duct tape = silently dead skunk. Or there's always rat poison in dog food. Just make sure Beemer's inside! ;-)